1. The Early Martian Society and Royal Court
An Ancient Alien Civilization: Long before human history unfolded on Earth, Mars was home to a hyper-advanced, peaceful utopian metropolis populated by Martians.
The Leadership of Abraham Lincoln: The society was ruled over for millennia by an immortal giant who took the form and identity of Abraham Lincoln, serving as the King of Mars. Alongside him stood a powerful royal court and protective knights, including a multi-headed Martian deity known as Grob Gob Glob Grod (frequently referred to simply by various individual components of his name).
The Brothers: Among the prominent Martians were two brothers: a brilliant scientist and inventor who would later become twisted by grief, and his sibling who served in the royal guard and high council.
2. The Tragedy of Margles and the Birth of Magic Man
The Arrival of Chaos: Peace on Mars was shattered when Golb, the cosmic entity of absolute chaos and discord, attacked the Martian metropolis.
Loss of a Loved One: During the catastrophic assault, Golb seized and erased Margles, the beloved wife of the king's scientist brother.
The Failed Defense: Devastated by the loss, the grieving scientist spent all his intellect building a massive planetary defense system named Margles to combat Golb if he ever returned. When the defense mechanism failed completely, the scientist suffered a total psychological break, drove himself mad, and delved deep into forbidden cosmic arts.
Exile: Renouncing his old life, he adopted the moniker Magic Man and began tormenting his fellow Martians with cruel, erratic pranks. Because his home planet could not execute him due to his status, he was officially banished to live out an exile on Earth, leaving behind a special teleporter that would only activate if he ever genuinely learned empathy and sought to return.
3. The Trial and Abraham Lincoln's Sacrifice
The Evasion and Capture: Years into his exile, Magic Man temporarily swapped bodies with Jake the Dog from Earth to dodge a long-awaited Martian arrest. Consequently, the innocent Jake was hauled back to Mars to stand trial before King Abraham Lincoln and the multi-headed guardian Glob.
The Death Sentence: Mistaken for the criminal, Jake faced execution via the Wand of Dispersment. During the chaotic intervention that followed, the visitor was accidentally erased from existence by the wand.
The Ultimate Bargain: Stricken with remorse over the unjust execution, King Abraham Lincoln traveled to the 37th Dead World to confront Death. Offering an ordinary currency trinket first and finding it insufficient, Lincoln chose to surrender his eternal life entirely, trading his divine immortality for the soul of Jake.
The Fall of the King: The trade successfully resurrected Jake, but the moment Lincoln relinquished his immortality, his colossal form hardened into a permanent, lifeless stone monument mirroring the real-world Lincoln Memorial, leaving Mars without its long-standing monarch.
4. Glob Takes Over
Ascension of the Deity: With Abraham Lincoln reduced to a statue and the royal leadership vacant, the multi-headed celestial protector Glob stepped forward to assume authority over the Martian metropolis.
A New Era for Mars: Glob took control of the governing duties of the floating red sphere, steering the advanced Martian civilization through its next epoch while maintaining watch over the cosmos and the unpredictable threats still drifting through space.